Sunday, November 27, 2016

My 2016 Journey: Lessons on Fear and Faith

Have you thought about what happened to your 2016? If I'm going to look back at how my year went, I can say that it was all full of daunting tasks, challenges and self-doubt. But then, in these bumps, I saw how grace overflowed. 2016 was the year we finally finished our house - a dream project we never thought we would be able to pull off. It was also the year that I took on added responsibilities at work. It was also the year that we needed to go out our comfort zone and transfer homes from Malabon to Quezon City. It was also the year that we needed to transfer our children to another school. It was a year that made me worry about a lot of things. 1. Would we have enough funds to finish the house the way we envisioned it? 2. Would I be able to do well with a new role at work? 2. Would we be able to survive being away from a solid support system in Malabon, where all my family and relatives are? 3. Would my children be able to adjust to a new school? I can conclude that it was indeed a year of disruptions. But I realized that it was also a year of surrender. Everyday, in my quiet time, I would open my heart about my fears and worries and I would always ask for hand-holding. I find myself being consoled with this verse: "Be still. And know that I am God." (Psalm 46:10) Knowing that my God is greater that all my worries, that everything is in His perfect will, sends a sense of calm in my being.

Tasks seemed insurmountable. It felt overwhelming sometimes. But days passed, things moved forward, and today I caught myself contemplating on the year that was. And I felt a tremendous sense of gratitude that I'm here...In a sweet,bright spot after a mountain climb. We've finished the house. We've already moved in. My nanay and tatay checks on us from time to time. The upside of being away from our support system meant that we have to rely on each other to get things done around the house. And it feels good that there's a lot teamwork going on. The girls are happier in their current school. There are more things to do at work, but I have magical helpers.

We just need to find our bright spot. Photo by Ramir Cruz.

I learned three things in my 2016 journey.
1. Worrying is such a waste of energy.
I'll mull over worst case scenarios. But it turns out, things are not bad at all. My Mount Everest is apparently an ant hill.
2. Days will move forward. Even if you don't.
So if you want to keep up, jump in. Do something. Resist being stuck. Go. Go. Go.
Nike said, just do it. Doing is the key. You wouldn't know how things will work out if you're paralyzed by your fears. Unknown is good. It's a call to adventure. Don't be scared about being wrong because you'll get the right thing eventually. But you have to do something, and now.
3. Do well, do good, and make God your partner.
Let God hold your hand. Don't resist that tiny little voice. Trust your heart. There's a lot of good stuff in there.

Have a happy day. Passing the good vibes your way.


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